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They weren’t “high-status males” with impressive jobs or flashy cars and fancy clothes.They didn’t have useful contacts for the social climbers or the money for those supposedly hypergamous women looking for the next level. who still managed to date sexy, intelligent, ambitious women. Being fun, being able to help someone enjoy themselves transcended looks and status.More than looks, more than money, more than whatever nebulous definition you want to give to “value” or “status”, the most attractive aspect of a man, that x-factor that nets him attention, attraction and dates is… Over the years as I was trying to make my transition from “dateless loser” to “ladies man”, I got to know a wide variety of folks who were good with women.Some were blessed with every advantage – classic good looks, money and charm – while others had to work for their success.

However, as much as making people feel good makes them like us, there’s more to it.

and it’s Being fun and helping others have fun is a way of keeping dates and potential relationship partners engaged and invested in the relationship.

It’s a vital part of the chemistry that helps ensure that not only will she enjoy the first date but that she’ll be interested in coming back for a second… The worst dates date just drains the life out of everyone involved.

My friend Miles – he who attracts women the way cheese attracts mice – was successful not just because he looked like the bastard son of Hugh Grant and Rob Lowe but because he knew how to be fun.

He was naturally outgoing and positive and instinctively understood how to make people feel good, how to feel guy who liked to tease and play around with everyone – especially the girls he was attracted to – and they would respond with great enthusiasm.

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